must rant…can’t…stop….myself……

maybe it is that i haven’t had a carb or a sugar in nearly 5 days…but today has sucked. the best part was weighing myself…haha. if that says anything. good news…i am down 4 lbs. yay!

i am hoping that this will be the last you hear of my old, lingering, cursed house that has been haunting me now for well over a year.

i have made a very conscious effort to never talk badly about my ex husband–mostly because i think it is tacky. however, some things need to be said. the boy doesn’t know the meaning of the word “responsible”. he has no concept of returning a phone call or following through, and he doesn’t seem to care whose time he has wasted. i have tried to overlook the fact that he owes me nearly 6 grand, or that he left me with all of our mutual debt (which he was supposed to pay half of), or that the many times he has told me he would pay me money, he has failed to come through, or that he hasn’t had a job in well over a year…and on and on. i was ready to let the house go in november when our realtors’ license expired. i was done. i couldn’t run after the ex anymore–i didn’t have the energy.

then mid november, he decided that we should make a last ditch effort to try to short sell the house. we had a broker that said he thought he could do it and john wanted to see what he could do for us. i said yes under one condition….that he would be the one to do all the dealings with the realtor and be the point of contact because i couldn’t do it anymore. he said sure. and got the ball rolling. he even did some work on the house that the broker suggested. things were going along fine until he decided to once again drop off the face of the earth. the mortgage company had changed the locks and gave john a copy of the key. he was and still is the only one that can get into the house. after the broker couldn’t get into the house, he told me if we were going to continue that i needed to be his main point of contact since he could never get a hold of john. i reluctantly said yes because i didn’t want to waste his time.

needless to say, it has been sort of a nightmare. after many attempts of trying to get john to get the key to the house to show it, after 3 weeks, it just hasn’t seemed to happen. today i had to tell the realtor that he could back out if he wanted because you can’t sell a home when only one party is available.

THEN–i opened my gas bill today for the old house–which has been nearly nothing for 6 months because NO ONE lives there…and lo and behold…i get a $200 bill. either john had been staying at the house OR he turned on the heat when he was working and forgot. either way, guess who will be paying it? yup me. along with all of the other bills he has left me with since he doesn’t really care about financial ruin.

so. here is to hoping that on feb 11th, the house forecloses and i am done. DONE! no more hunting down the ex. no more worrying about that damn house. i need to be done and move on. the thought of having to hunt john down for offers, or to go to a closing seems virtually impossible most of the time. it is daunting and incredibly frustrating.

lesson learned? don’t buy a house with another person. i will never do it again. i will NEVER join finances with another human being ever again. i will be responsible for myself and no one else.

from now on, i will trust myself, love myself, and be responsible for myself and no one else. this doesn’t mean i am not open to others…but it certainly means that i will never put myself in another situation to be financially ruined by a man. never again. they can have my heart…but they can not have my pin number.

and even the heart is going to be much harder to get from now on.



life other than that is fantastic!! school started!! yay! going to be a difficult but amazing semester.

work is INSANE right now. i am so busy i don’t know what to do. i don’t really know how i have time to blog right now. oh wait, i don’t. but my sanity required it.

new albums that i am obsessed with: rihanna, “rated R”, lady gaga “the fame monster” and ingrid michaelson “boys and girls”. i needed some crazy dance-y pop music and followed it off with sad love songs. perfect!

did i mention i have lost 4 lbs?

loves loves. thanks for listening to my ranting and raving. at least in one month, this will all be over!!!


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