i am generally feeling pensive. which i suppose isn’t really very different than most days. except for it feels different than most days, everyday. or something…
what is spring’s problem? why is it still snowing in my city?
it makes me want to scream into a pillow.
st louis was astounding and bewildering. full of lots of interesting people and places and things. my presentation went very well and i was happy with the turn out for our panel and the questions and responses that came after the presentations. the weather was very much the opposite of slc, and that was appreciated more than i can tell you.
a few things to think about after the trip: i sure do like my program, but i need to be in a creative writing program for my phd. no question about it. i can write papers until i am blue in the face. i can pontificate on theory and rhetoric for days on end. i can talk about design and useability testing and technical writing as much as you need me to. but as soon as this program is over…i am going back to writing what i want: poetry. not that i haven’t been writing it….um, cause i have been. with a sort of colorful fury it seems. i miss workshopping. and most of the time i hate the idea of workshopping.
at least i will have a book on the language and rhetoric of death when i am done. and at least my resume will be pretty bad ass. a professional program is great.
i am sick of being a professional.
i really was dreading coming back to work today.
i am really sick of utah.
i am SO ready for a major change in location and emphasis.
where are the tulips???