panic

so, i keep waking up in the middle of the night having panic attacks. in fact, i keep having mild panic attacks on most days and then having severe ones at night. who wakes up from a deep sleep with a panic attack? i thought that sounded super weird, so today, i did some research. come to find out, those who deal with panic disorder often times wake up in the middle of the night with anxiety attacks, as well as have them throughout the day. many times they have no idea WHY they are even having attack because a stressful situation is not currently taking place.

welcome to my life.

funny thing is that i have no problem living my life or doing the things that i need to do. i just plug along. however, everyone who knows me know that i consistently have a shit ton on my plate and down time doesn’t really exist in my world. so perhaps i am not feeling as though there is an immediate threat of stress in my life–because EVERYTHING i am doing is stressful. maybe my body is just pissed.

however, i would like to not feel like my heart is going to explode all the time.

2011 is going to be the year of healthy chelsea. i haven’t been to the doctor or dentist in far too long. therefore, a physical and some teeth cleaning are in order. also, maybe it is time to actually try some therapy. you know, since i never did when my life spun out of control.

until then, bring on the holiday food, beer, and panic attacks. i can deal with anything for 2 more months.

🙂

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